Miss Cuddlywumps Investigates the Minds of Dogs
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| Incredible but true: Dogs have brains. |
I, Miss Cuddlywumps, am stunned. Absolutely stunned. I could
not be more stunned. Why? Because this morning She of Little Talent informed me
of this latest scientific discovery:
Dogs have brains.
Hard to believe, I know. But wait.… Not only do dogs have
brains, dogs also have a “voice area” in their brains just like humans do.
Apparently this voice area helps dogs recognize voices and understand the emotion
behind the voice. So a dog can tell, just by how you sound, whether you are
happy, sad, or in distress. Incredible.
The scientists learned all this by convincing some dogs to
lie still in an MRI machine and have their heads scanned. Some humans also
agreed to lie still and have their heads scanned. This fact alone will tell you
that dogs and humans are “on the same page,” so to speak, and are willing to do
silly things just because someone gives them bacon.
Cats are not like this. If you told a cat to lie still and
have her head scanned, she would vehemently refuse. Blood would be spilled (yours). We cats prefer to lie still
on a comfy couch and do our own scanning, thank you very much. Do not even
dream of trying to scan a cat, because we are far too busy to participate in
your silly endeavors. Besides, even a very average cat has enough brain power
to break your expensive scanning machine, and we do so hate to see you cry when
your toys break.
You are curious now about whether cats have a “voice area”
in their brains like dogs and humans do. I am telling you now this question is
irrelevant because we do not need a voice area. We cats gather vital
information by psychic intuition. We do not need to hear your voice to know whether
you intend to feed us soon. We do not need to hear the dog bark to know the dog
is rather stupid.
So there.
[She of Little Talent hastens to add: We love dogs. Dogs are
great companions, and very smart.]
[Miss C hastens to add: Do not listen to old SoLT, for her brain is no better than a dog's. Poor old SoLT.]
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